One Month Old. Slow Your Roll, Kid.

Hey Jasper,

This is your Mom: you know, the blurry body pillow who smells vaguely of coconut oil and tortilla chips?

Happy one month, slugger.

I’d ask the cliched question of Where Has The Time Gone…but I totally know. By the time you and I came home from the hospital, it was Christmas Eve Eve…then Christmas and New Years came and went in a blur of foil wrapping paper and 2am feedings…then came the revolving door of relatives and best friends (a new loved one/food prepper every four days!) which led your eldest sister to constantly ask who was sleeping in the guest room and your middle sister to blankly refer to people as “…Auntie” when telling a story…and then some more 2am feedings (and sometimes 3am and 4am and 4:15am and 4:22am and 4:49am)…and suddenly you’re one month old, which is very different than the Four Weeks Old we celebrated last Thursday because I’m your mother and I have hormones.

Time racing along aside, I truly can’t remember life without you. (Sure, sure, it’d be so easy to blame the initial week of drugs and the current week of sleep deprivation, but I’m going with sentiment, thankyouverymuch.) Hasn’t dinnertime always meant wearing you in a sling (while you wore some of Susannah’s peas)? How on earth did I ever enjoy watching a show without one kid on my shoulder and two on my lap? And typing with both hands while fully clothed is completely, utterly overrated.

Even though we didn’t know about you until 1:44pm on December 19th, 2013, I should’ve guessed. I really should’ve had an inkling that my life wouldn’t be this euphoric without a small, dark-haired guy possessing [currently] olive green eyes. That a little man with a shy smile of recognition would steal my heart and put it in the pocket of his baggy overalls. And that I was meant to be the Mom of a little boy and he’s always been you and now that you’re here my heart and my world (and my minivan) are fuller than I ever could’ve imagined.

And I’ve always had a really, really good imagination.

Little Buddy, I’m so glad you’re here. And in thanks, I promise to keep the My Little Ponies off of your head. Unless you dig ’em there.

Which is totally cool by me.

Because whatever and whoever and wherever and however you choose to live your life, I’m already on your side and will be forever. Don’t believe me? When you get a little older, take a random poll of our loved ones and ask how many of them have ever spent a pleasant 3am with me. (Aside from your sisters, it has never, ever happened. Some people weren’t meant for the non-daylight hours.)

I love you to the moon, Jasper.

See you at 3am.

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