My weirdest memories. (Happy Mother’s Day, Mom!)

keely mom mother's day

My Mom has four daughters. I’m the second of four. Our household was simply always going a mile a minute, yet- YET- when I was in second grade and decided that I really, really needed my name to be Samantha, she actively attempted to call me Samantha for funsies. At least a handful of times. (The other times she was calling me Kate/Rachel/Emily/some amalgamation of pets’ names.) As a Mom now, that blows my mind; I was requesting that she disregard {Read More}

9 ways you know you work from home

Keely works from home

In a completely unscientific, alarmingly biased poll (which I asked myself and nobody else), here are… 9 Ways You Know You Work From Home (a true story) The concept of “office” has all been obliterated. This is great! Unfortunately, the concept of “desk” and “delineated work spaces” isn’t always held as sacred. Sometimes this means working on the floor. Of your car. In the garage. (While the Frozen soundtrack is blasting.) Sure, your old coworkers had their quirks, but the {Read More}

The stunning next installment of the Mystery Camera saga!

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(…I have so many questions.) So, remember a few weeks back when I dropped off a roll of actual film from an actual- prehistoric- disposable camera and people had many, many reactions to it? I sure do! (It may take a few more sessions of therapy to get it out of my brain.) Well, I finally picked it up and was so excited to see what was on that ol’ wedding table camera! Drunken party guests? A sweet candid of my groom {Read More}

Disposable cameras and other relics

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While digging through the storage bins of my “desk” “area” (yes, both of those nouns are separately deserving of air quotes), I came across a tiny disposable camera. It was covered in wedding bells and looked suuuper dated, so I knew immediately it was one of my long lost wedding tabletop cameras. (…From nine years ago.) I knew the quality wasn’t going to be superb. (I mean, I love my nearest and dearest, but put a few glasses of wine {Read More}

#RiseUp, a.k.a. Time to go back to church

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In today’s tale of… #BestLife questionable parenting moments …We have a quote from the one and only, five year-old, establishment-smashing child of mine. From the backseat of the car this morning, Suzy piped up with a question. “Mom? Do all churches have pictures of Jesus?” Knowing this was Suzy, and knowing that was not the real question she was asking, I paused for a second. “Well, Christian churches do.” “All?” “I think so, sweetheart.” “So, none have pictures of Alexander Hamilton?” {Read More}

Live-blogging jury duty*

Jury Duty

*…Not really. Because I’m fairly sure that’s illegal. Let’s try: Slightly time-delayed reporting on jury duty! I’m actually pretty excited about it. I’ve been training for this my entire life, what with the marathon sessions of Law & Order. (And Law & Order: Criminal Intent and Law & Order: Special Victims Unit and Law & Order: Trial by Jury and oh my God, am I now in that one?!) Some of you who’ve been reading since way back in the day {Read More}

Summertime haikus.

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Out of bread by noon Why do kids need to eat lunch It’s called “tapas,” guys. * Oh, working from home Togetherness redefined Please get off my ribs. * Sweet God, so much pee What are you aiming at, child? Potty training hurts. * * Let’s just lay out back. You smell like sunscreen, kiddo. That’s a great cloud shape. * That’s not an outfit Fine, it’ll do for today Jammies forever! * Is that what we do? You need {Read More}

Heartburn, A.K.A. How not to eat with a 2 year-old.

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The time: 7:56 a.m. The scene: The living room floor I could tell that the two littles were going to have a special brand of crazy for their day. Waking with the sun didn’t help. The humidity making their breakfast-covered jammies stick to their crabby little bodies didn’t do much to improve morale, either. So I decided to streamline my morning routine to almost nil, in order to turn this day around as soon as humanly possible. Please keep in {Read More}